LIAR!! Using Body Language to Detect Deception

In case you missed it, I did a mini-workshop on Twitter last week for the #notRWA19 group (those who weren't able to attend the RWA National Conference in New York) and I thought my blog readers might appreciate a look at it.

Body language and expressions are an area of interest of mine.  It started out because I'm not skilled at picking up social cues, so I had to teach myself (and my kids, who inherited my social blindness).  As I researched and compiled information, I found myself with a great writing resource and I started presenting workshops on different aspects of body language.

For #notRWA19, I did a thread on how to use body language to detect deception, both in life and for your POV characters.  Most of the information here is from Dr. Paul Eklund's books and research.

It would make life so much easier but sadly, there are no universal signs that someone is lying to you.  We see a lot of lists that claim to be able to expose liars, and most of them include things like avoiding eye contact, fidgeting and sweating.  However, the things on those lists tend to be signs of increased anxiety, which doesn't always correspond to lying.


That said, there are postures and expressions that can help a person to figure out if someone is trying to deceive them.  But they're not quite as simple as "touching their nose means a person is LYING!!!" would like us all to believe.

There are three signs which can indicate deception:
- increased anxiety (** with a caveat that this is the most complicated and unreliable sign)
- mismatched emotional reactions
- uneven expressions/postures

Lying to another person makes most people anxious.  It's stressful to have to remember details, to evaluate others' reactions, and since most people have a goal when they lie, to worry about whether or not they'll get the result they want.  The anxiety can be especially high if the situation involves an authority figure or a high stakes scenario.

That said, there are plenty of people who don't display any sign of nerves when lying, no matter how intense the situation is.  And there are people who are naturally anxious, who will show signs of nerves in the most innocuous of situations.  In general, anxiety as a tell for deception is most effective with people that we know well enough to see whether or not their behaviour is an increase in anxiety or just their regular baseline.

Signs of anxiety include sweating, twitching, fidgeting, faster breathing, increased heartrate, and flicking eyes.  It also includes self-soothing gestures like touching their own skin, hair or stroking their own hand.

But, really, all that signs of anxiety tell you is that a person is anxious.  It doesn't tell you why that person is anxious.  They might be afraid that their listener isn't believing them (for example, if the listener is a police officer who is accusing them of a crime) or they might be afraid about making a mistake (for example, when relating an account of what has happened to them), or they might be embarrassed (for example, wanting to gloss over particular details), or even just not wanting to hurt someone's feelings.  Anxiety alone doesn't necessarily mean lying.

In general, if someone is lying, you'll see mismatched emotional expressions (when the expressed emotion doesn't match the words/situation)  and/or uneven expressions or postures (done with only part of the body/face or beginning on one side instead of evenly).

If someone is lying, they'll try to assume the appropriate emotions to what they're saying.  Eg, if you're claiming you can't come to work because your grandmother died, you'll probably try to sound and look sad.  However, people can't completely suppress their actual emotions, so the truth will leak through for a split second, which is called a microexpression.

This is actually a slowed down version.

Interestingly, the only ones who have success at having their expressions match a false story are professional actors, and they cheat (kind of).  They use their own memories and experiences to generate genuine emotions on cue.  It sounds simple but it's actually quite difficult.

Another interesting (though sad) fact, is that psychologist first grew interested in microexpressions as a way to figure out which patients were lying about intending to self-harm.  The patients would lie very convincingly, claiming to be happy and excited, but when discharged, would attempt (or succeed) suicide.  In looking at video recordings of the sessions, the psychologists discovered split-second expressions of grief and pain in the faces of those patients who later hurt themselves.

One of the most reliable signs of deception is called "duping delight" and it's a combination of contempt, relief and glee.  Most good liars try to mask it but it can still come through as a microexpression.

Uneven postures and expressions are another way that people mask their real reactions.  Natural expressions are always symmetrical (unless there's a physical reason why they can't be).  But if someone is deliberately making the same expression, it will be uneven.  It might be only on one side of their face or body (one sided shrug or smile are the most common).  Or it will begin more on one side before evening out.  Forced expressions will also tend to switch faster than natural ones, eg: the smile will appear and disappear faster.

Fun fact: a one sided shrug is often an indication of suppressed helplessness, and can be a reasonably reliable indicator of a long term deception.

Another side of uneven expressions are when different parts of the body are sending different messages.  Like feet pointing toward the exit when someone is talking to you.  It's a subconscious sign that they're ready to run.  Or nodding when saying no, or shaking their head when saying yes.  Or smiling but having the eyes show fear or anger.  In all of these cases, the gesture is the truth.  We have less conscious control over our movements than we do over our words, the eyes are less controllable than the mouth.

One final caveat, even if someone is lying, it's not necessarily due to a malicious reason.  We lie to avoid hurting people, to avoid embarrassing ourselves, to fit in socially, and sometimes because we wish what we were saying was true.

That said, it can be such a relief to spot signs of dishonesty in a person's behaviour.  Especially if our instincts have already rung alarms that the person is not being truthful with us or that their intent doesn't match their external actions.  It takes away confidence-sapping second-guessing and removes the opportunity for others to gaslight or manipulate us.

(Princess Bride gif: Liar!  Liaaaarrr!)

Previous blog post: Hidden Diamond, Jaycee Jarvis and her fantasy romance series and the importance of creating a satisfying emotional experience for your readers.

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